I am happy to post what I consider a work in progress (I believe there is always room for improvement in certain things we do) that I hope will help others. I have written five Basic Concepts that helped me remain sober and find greater happiness in my life. You can click Next Step: Creating Our Path to see how the idea was formed.
I wrote about this in my book, and for those who read it, let me add that although I tried to be something I wasn’t throughout my drinking days, and even in my early sobriety, I am not doing that now. I am actually worried that maybe I’m asking too much of myself—I feel fearful at times when thinking about trying to start a new type of meeting/discussion group.
Although I may not know what my future holds in this endeavor. I do hope that along with believing in myself, trying to believe that something created life and the universe for a reason will also be a part of it.
Of course, thinking about doing this adds to my fear. But when you write a book called Facing Our Fears, well, I think you get the point.
Here are the Basic Concepts of Creating Our Path.
1. We are capable of creating our happiness through the Six Selves
Self-Awareness– Accepting that we need help in understanding the patterns and emotions behind our thoughts and behaviors. Knowing our strengths, but also where we need to grow.
Self-Improvement– Changing negative thoughts and behaviors to positive ones. Seek knowledge in a variety of subjects. Search for answers needed to grow as a person. Be open-minded to others’ values and beliefs. Practice love, kindness, understanding, and tolerance toward others.
Self-Confidence– We need to learn the difference between having a realistic confidence in our own judgment, ability, power, etc., and having an excessive or inflated one. What are we good at? What do we like about ourselves? What do we need to do to grow in our self-confidence?
Self-Esteem– How do we view our self-worth?
Practice love, kindness, understanding, and tolerance toward ourselves.
Self-Love– The instinct or desire to promote one’s own well-being; regard for or love of one’s self.
Self-Actualization– The realization or fulfillment of one’s talents and potentialities; considered as a drive or need.
2. We are capable of changing ourselves for the better
We understand the power of changing any negative thoughts and beliefs we hold about ourselves, others, and life in general.
3. We are capable of changing our lives for the better
We understand how important behaving and living differently is to our sobriety and happiness.
4. We are capable of loving ourselves and others
We become more receptive and accepting of love. We are able to cultivate unshakable self-worth.
We are able to forgive ourselves and others more quickly.
5. We are capable of being happy with who we are
We realize how being happy with ourselves sustains us in times of uncertainty and unwanted circumstances.
We are able to laugh at ourselves and embrace all that we are.